Skip to main content

Crazy Samurai: 400 vs 1 (2021) - Spend this time reading a book

"Crazy Samurai: 400 vs 1" - plot summary: umm yeah [eyes roll askance] like, there isn't really a plot.

 

Some dude killed some other dude and his clan arranged a duel to avenge the death. Instead of a duel, they intend to ambush him with 400 samurai - before the movie started. So we sit around with 400 guys waiting on the one guy and dribble that exposition for about 8 minutes and then the title card (and there is a nice cgi butterfly which gets a call back in the last 5 minutes) - then we begin a 70+ minute long one-shot of a one-on-many sword battle through a landscape that reminded me of central Texas and a conveniently staged Japanese ghost town.

 

The 1-guy hacks the 400. He boinks a lot of them on the top of the head - I found this technique surprisingly effective. For variety, there is a very short exchange with a shirtless guy with a chain, some crude dialogue between two of the 400 about cowardice, and a young woman with a bundle of firewood walks through. Those interludes take up about 3 minutes total. It seems that 1-guy hid water and a cookie in the ghost town before the battle. On again off again moody music and a lot of grunting. Occasionally we zoom into his eyes (presumably so the extras can get reset). I didn't keep track, but it probably was at least 400 unique demonstrations of dramatic falling down. With cgi blood there is really no gore, and since they did not actually have 400 paid extras there are no bodies laying around.

 

This is a 90 minute movie - minutes 8 to 83 are a test of endurance (for the main character and the audience). Feel free to get up and get some water, popcorn or go the bathroom without pausing. You will not miss anything. I wish my video editing skills were decent - I could make a watchable 20 minute version. There are much better examples of this genre of you want recommendations

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Thing in the Basement

What do you do if you have 6th, 7th, and 12th place finishers in the 'Michael Stivic look-a-like contest - and a product placement deal with Budweiser?  You get Rick Baker's neighbor (other side of the street, a few doors down) to make you a creature costume. Then you go get the writer who did a day's work punching up one poker scene for an episode of MASH but got fired for refusing footwear on the set. In 1973, you could get a Thompson machine gun and grenades practically everywhere - so that is no problem. Then you grab you 8mm camera and put it to work on your singular masterpiece.  Really - this is fun. I could not put a name to who Fernman reminded me of, but I did think the art director did a fantastic job capturing his je ne sais quoi with the skull. Soundtrack is great. Last thing (if you were wondering): YES, this is in the same cinematic universe as "Drop Dead Fred" - this is the Fred who was hanging out with Phoebe Cates.
Post a Comment
Read more

Con Air (1997) - another example of the Jacob's ladder effect

As we work our way through Merry Cage-mas, an argument could be made that "Con Air" is a fever dream Nick Cage's character has just before dying during that opening bar fight. 1) Monica Potter has abs of steel and is supposedly pregnant with their daughter. She is so not pregnant looking. So much so that, I do not know how they would have been far enough along to ultrasound the embryo. Additionally, he has just walked off a fishing boat into the bar she works at after getting home from deployment - when was the child conceived? 2) Nick Cage is immediately arrested and  sentenced to seven years in prison. During the film he writes & received fully formed letters from this child. In them, he talks about all the things they used to do with each other. When did these things happen?  3) Upon making his way into the titular 'Con Air' plane, Nick Cage has a shrink wrapped bunny rabbit doll he bought for this little girl as a present. Where did that come from? The pri...
Post a Comment
Read more

Big Deal on Madonna Street (1958) - it is a good deal better than the remakes

I got around to watching the original 1958 comedy caper film - the one that "Welcome to Collinwood" was pantomiming. "Big Deal on Madonna Street" is hilarious. It is 25 minutes longer than the remake and never once did I feel the need to check my watch. I even paused to go refill my water glass. There will be no problem telling who is who or how the story goes - it is well shot and characters are unique. The story is a simple and fun. Comparing the "BDoMS" and "WtC" - they are identical in terms of characters and scenes. "Big Deal on Madonna Street" street is terrific, and "WtC" is a slog. The biggest difference is seen in the dialog. In "Big Deal" the people just talk, like you might expect people to talk. They are funny, but not odd. The colloquialisms happen, but they aren't hard to see through. In "WtC", they are using a vernacular to make sure you are immersed deep in an Eastern European ethnic nei...
Post a Comment
Read more