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Con Air (1997) - another example of the Jacob's ladder effect

As we work our way through Merry Cage-mas, an argument could be made that "Con Air" is a fever dream Nick Cage's character has just before dying during that opening bar fight.

1) Monica Potter has abs of steel and is supposedly pregnant with their daughter. She is so not pregnant looking. So much so that, I do not know how they would have been far enough along to ultrasound the embryo. Additionally, he has just walked off a fishing boat into the bar she works at after getting home from deployment - when was the child conceived?

2) Nick Cage is immediately arrested and  sentenced to seven years in prison. During the film he writes & received fully formed letters from this child. In them, he talks about all the things they used to do with each other. When did these things happen? 

3) Upon making his way into the titular 'Con Air' plane, Nick Cage has a shrink wrapped bunny rabbit doll he bought for this little girl as a present. Where did that come from? The prison commissary? Amongst the ramen, tooth paste, and playing cards, they also had stuffed animals? 

I could go on - how exactly does Garland "Marietta Mangler" Greene drive across 3 states while wearing someone's head as a hat? How did he keep it attached? What was he driving that he has enough head room for 2 heads (his and the victims)? How has the 39 year old Cyrus "the virus" Grissom spent 25 of his years in person? If they were consecutive, he went to prison at age 14. If not, then he started sooner. When did he have time to become such a notorious criminal? Cage & Bubba Shrimp, an insulin dependant diabetic, meet-cute after sharing those Hostess Sno-Ball things. A great snack, but wontonly careless with his blood sugar situation.

The only rational explanation is that Cage is killed at 5 minute mark and we are watching a "Jacob's Ladder" (1990) situation for the rest of the film. "Con Air" (1997) may be one of the best movies ever made. Happy Cage-mas folks.

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